Written By: Alisa Ross

If Alisa’s story resonates with you, connect with her via Instagram: @alisamarie0513

My name is Alisa, I’m 34 years old and live in Green Bay, Wisconsin.

On February 24, 2017 my life was turned upside down! I was diagnosed with Stage 2B Triple Positive Breast Cancer at 27 years old. I met with a local fertility clinic in hopes to retrieve eggs and freeze them before starting chemo. However, my cancer was fueled off estrogen and progesterone, and I would have had to been given these hormones to retrieve my eggs, so, there wasn’t enough time for me to complete an egg retrieval cycle without risk of my cancer progressing. I needed to start chemotherapy immediately.

I went through 6 rounds of chemo – every three weeks. Four different medications were given, followed by an additional year or infusions. I was never put on anything to shut my ovaries down during chemo. I had a bilateral mastectomy, knowing I’d never be able to breastfeed. I then completed 33 rounds of radiation. I took an oral mediation called tamoxifen, which blocks estrogen, for a year and a half.

It was then time to try for a baby. After an ectopic pregnancy and two failed rounds of egg retrievals, my gynecologist, who also found my breast lump, suggested using donor eggs! She said your “uterus is perfect and that’s all you need!” This thought had never crossed my mind before!

Because of my breast cancer, my oncologist and I decided I would have my ovaries removed. In October of 2021, I had my ovaries and fallopian tubes removed. The donor egg IVF process then began!

Choosing a donor wasn’t easy. I was having a hard time accepting our child wasn’t going to have any of my DNA. However, growing up adopted I knew first hand how easy someone could love you despite not sharing DNA. Having a donor who had brown hair like me and green eyes was something we hoped to find.

The first donor I picked ended up not working out and it felt like we were starting all over again. The fertility clinic we belonged to was affiliated with an online egg donor bank. The bank shows pictures of the donor as children and what they look like now. Education, medical/family history, reasons for wanting to donate, etc, are all included in the donor profiles. I spent a lot of time sorting through these profiles, finally coming to a decision on our donor. One part of her profile that really stuck out to me was under her message for recipients section, she stated “I hope that you love this child with intention and always recognize their uniqueness. As a child who is allowed to grow unhindered by cages could change the very fabric of the world we live in”.

That quote really tugged at my heart, especially since she called out how unique and special our child would be. Since I was adopted and now would bring a child into this world through egg donation, I felt like she was speaking to my soul. 

We picked her and the long process began! We ended up with six beautiful embryos! On May 16 2022, just three days after my 33rd birthday, we transferred our best embryo! That embryo turned out to be a blue eyed, 7 pound, 11 ounce, beautiful baby boy named Bodhi! He was born on January 24 2023.

We have 5 embryos remaining and are preparing for our second transfer in the new year! We’re looking forward to hopefully hearing a new heart beating!